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Articles by
Louie Aronowitz
Louie Aronowitz is an award-winning writer, performer, and musician. He has worked with Saturday Night Live, Comedy Central, Funny or Die, Nickelodeon, and College Humor.
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April 11, 2025Forget the Ten Plagues and Escaping, the Pharaoh and His Rich Friends Say They’re on Our Side
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December 23, 2024Job Posting: Team Leader for the Maccabees
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July 31, 2024Lesser-Known Goals
of Project 2025 -
June 14, 2024Trolley Problem Variations for Dads
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February 13, 2023Candy Heart Messages After Elon Musk Buys Sweethearts for $44 Billion
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June 29, 2022First Drafts of Classic Movie Quotes
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March 22, 2022First Drafts of the Greatest Opening Sentences in Literature
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October 22, 2021Actually, Sandworm Attacks Have Only a One Percent Death Rate
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May 7, 2021Gregor Samsa’s DIY Mother’s Day Gift Ideas
Trending 🔥
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April 25, 2025This Five-Hundred-Word Bumper Sticker on My Tesla Explains Why I’m Not a Bad Person
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May 5, 2025Lest We Forget the Horrors: An Unending Catalog of Trump’s Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes
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April 21, 2025Getting Ahead of It: JD Vance Almost Definitely Didn’t Kill the Pope
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April 23, 2025I Love You More Than Anything, but I Would Rather Die Than Talk to You on the Phone
Recently
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May 7, 2025I’m the Imaginary Migrant Who Crossed the Darién Gap to Vote in the United States
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May 6, 2025My PR Degree Did Not Prepare Me to Run the Vatican’s Social Media. How Do I Launch the New Pope?
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May 6, 2025Introducing Our University’s New, Totally Reasonable Criteria for Promotion and Tenure
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May 6, 2025Phew, for a Minute There, I Thought the Arts Were Going to Get Too Much Funding