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All posts tagged
autumn
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November 13, 2024Rules for Our Cranberry Bog
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October 11, 2024Brutally Honest Instructions for Visiting a Pumpkin Patch
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September 26, 2024Frequently Asked Questions About Leaf Blowers
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September 20, 2024It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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October 25, 2023I Love When the Leaves Turn Beautiful Colors and Fall to Their Deaths
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October 24, 2023For Your Crimes, You Have Been Sentenced to Unpaid Labor at a Pumpkin Patch
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September 25, 2023What I’ll Do with the One Week I Can Wear My Sensible Fall Jacket
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September 23, 2022On the Eighth Day, Leon Leonwood Bean Said, “Let There Be Flannel Shirts”
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August 30, 2022I’ll Drink this Pumpkin Spice Latte Before Labor Day, But Only Because Demons Are Making Me
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November 24, 2020How to Make a Cornucopia, Because It’s Come to This
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April 25, 2025This Five-Hundred-Word Bumper Sticker on My Tesla Explains Why I’m Not a Bad Person
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May 8, 2025An Open Letter to Robert F. Kennedy Jr., Who Thinks My Daughter Is a Tragedy
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May 6, 2025Introducing Our University’s New, Totally Reasonable Criteria for Promotion and Tenure
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May 5, 2025Lest We Forget the Horrors: An Unending Catalog of Trump’s Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes